A Canadian gal living in Britain with 3 men and a dog. Wine helps.

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Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Where Does Time Go?

It has been over a month now since Andy and I got married and nearly a month since we have been back in the country. In some ways all has been quiet, but in other ways its been quite busy. Andy finally went back to work over two weeks ago and luckily he is working locally. What has been unlucky is that he hasn't been paid yet. He was supposed to have been paid yesterday but for some reason was not. One of the downfalls of being self-employed I suppose. They have promised him his pay by Friday. Yeah, ok. I know from past experience that this is unlikely and that he probably won't see this week's pay until its doubled up next Tuesday. Which is ok if you don't have bills to pay or haven't had a paycheck in over a month!

In respect to jobs, I have two interviews coming up. One on Friday for a part-time secretarial position at the local hospital, and one on Monday for a casual position at the hospital (here they call it Bank Staff). I only got the call for the Bank interview this morning. The interview on Friday is the one I'm looking forward to. They've already checked my references, which is unusual, but in this case its something I'm pleased about. I also am staying optimistic, no matter what the outcome might be because to even get called for an interview, especially at the hospital, is encouraging. I have to admit that I would prefer to get a part-time job rather than full-time. Now that I'm a married woman I have other responsibilities (wink) and as long as Andy is working there really is no need to work full-time

Last week my friend made a BIG boo boo and spent all night away from home. I woke up to the phone ringing and someone banging at the door simultaneously. It was Andy on the phone informing me that my friend's husband had called his mobile wondering if his wife had spent the night at our place. Andy brilliantly kept himself out of it by saying he had no idea - that he was asleep when I got home and that he dashed straight out the door that morning, without noticing if someone was in the spare room. I got of the phone after being warned by Andy that P would be coming around. I figured that was him banging on the door. It was.

To recap events CA and I had planned to have a few drinks at the pub across the street. Her first stop was going to be at P's cousin's house to pick up a picture he'd drawn of their daughter. CA had made plans for her child to spend the night at her friends. Now... this is a woman who has been sexually frustrated for five years. Her husband has not touched her, nor slept in the same room as her during this period of time. They basically just co-exist in the house for the sake of their daughter. Her husband, who has just opened his own restaurant seems fine with the set up. She for the most part is unhappy but they have a nice home and life-style - other than the lack of support from her husband I suppose she figured she'd be ok. She didn't bank on a few drinks leading to a few more, which ultimately led to a bottle of vodka being shared at the artists house. (I had left after one drink at the pub - Andy wasn't feeling well and as her husband's cousin J had joined her for her drink with me, I figured they'd be fine). I figured wrong.

So. Back to P. I opened the door to find him there asking if his wife was with me as she hadn't come home last night. (He had been out at a golf awards evening with his friends and family - he hadn't invited his wife until early that evening). She wasn't. While he was sitting across from me on the couch my phone rang and it was her telling me she was drunk and at J's house. I told her I had her husband in my living room and would she like a word with him. She told me no and rang off. Oh boy. I had no choice but to tell him where she was. He left.

I have spent the past few days with my friend trying to help her get through the mess that has resulted due to her actions. I don't blame her for wanting to relieve her sexual frustrations. I do however wish she had used her head and not done so with her husband's cousin - resulting in a bust up of their family. She's had phone calls from her mother-in-law, a visit from an enraged aunt (J's mother) and her husband disappeared for the weekend. On Monday I was with her as she proceeded to see a lawyer, call her daughter's school, their accountants, etc. to inform all that she and her husband have split for good. She was adamant she didn't want him back and that they would divorce. She even called her parents in Toronto. We made arrangements for me to help her out with the care of her daughter and I left her to it. Last night I called to see how she was and to see if she still needed me to sit for her girl tonight. No, she said, P will be doing it. I was glad they had apparently talked. It went deeper than that as he was back and I guess they are going to try and work things out. I didn't get much out of her as she obviously couldn't talk at that moment. Maybe they'd only been just working it out at that moment. Who knows? I guess she'll let me know Friday. I don't understand how some people work, but hey, who am I to try and figure it all out?

(Normally I wouldn't blog about such personal events however my friend came right out and asked me if I would be blogging about it - I guess she knew it was a whopper, and since she gave me the go ahead, why not?)

Back to the Wedding - The Party

The party swiftly got under way when the tables were cleared and the dancing began. It was a nice set up because we had the room for dancing, there was the bar itself (a separate and rather cozy room) and off the bar there was a conservatory that Taylor turned into the Kareokee room after the first hour or two. It was really good as people had the option of what they wanted to do. Again, it was such a nice day and evening that some people even spent most of the night outdoors.

Andy and I didn't have the traditionally first dance together - we actually requested that the DJ start off the dancing with something catchy. It was Bruce and Ruth Devenne that actually got the dancing started, lol. It was nice mingling with everyone, however Andy and I didn't end up actually getting to spend much time together until later on, when we got in the hot tub and pool. We did get one slow song together, thankfully. We basically spent the evening making sure everyone was ok, and passing each other along the way - usually with me informing him he had to settle up at the bar with Sandy for whatever drink I was drinking (usually it was just diet coke). I have to say, I was really pleased with the bar service, Sandy was terrific and had tons of patience for all the boozers (and trust me - there was plenty of that going on, lol). A few times she even found me to get me to try a frozen drink she had concocted, just for me. She'd actually made up two drinks in honour of our wedding, in the names of both our families.

It was funny to walk around and watch people having fun, dancing, eating wedding cake and getting corked. It was a really home-like atmosphere, made even more so when my cousin Denise came downstairs in her nightclothes to kiss the bride goodnight!

I missed a lot of the funny stuff due to being in different rooms but I was later filled in on some things I missed. Although I never usually saw Andy without a drink in each hand, he was holding up really well. I think he was more high on the night than the drink. But speaking of...


Sunday morning after the wedding as well as the next few days were spent happily reminiscing over the events of Saturday night. It's like Andy and I said, if there was gonna be a wedding celebration were people were free to be themselves and get as drunk as they wanted, it would be ours - and happily so. As long as no one got nasty, we weren't bothered and didn't want anyone else to be either.

Here are a few of my nearest and dearest who made the night memorable by totally enjoying themselves with drink.

Bill Clancey (who spent a chunk of time at the bar with Davida): 'I think I did one too many McDonald shooters' as he came swaying out of the bar with a laughing Kristin...

Scott and Alison: But only in their usual English style.

My Dad 'Your going to miss one BITCH of a BBQ tomorrow night!' This was slurred to Darla in the presence of Wendy (Andy's mom - who ABHORS swearing of any kind,lol). I knew my dad was well on his way when he came staggering out onto the patio and I saw the look on my mom's face. Andy's dad Dave and his pal Andy spent most of the evening in a corner of the bar drinking whiskey - my dad bless him, tried and failed to keep up!

My Uncle Reg and Catherine: I saw Catherine lots during the night, always smiling and having a good time. She was dancing a lot with her man Hunter and my little cousin Kyi. However I saw her off and on dancing and laughing with my Uncle Reg (Catherine knows my family practically like her own). It has since come out that my Uncle kept talking to Cat and Hunter all night about Myskiki something or other (I know I'm spelling that wrong)forgetting that he had just told them all about it in previous conversations. What was funniest was when they got into an argument in the bar over kareokee... Cat came out of the solarium and bawled my uncle out for not being there to sing with her like he promised. He then grabbed her to take her back in, saying he would now, at which point they fell together. My uncle's drink fell, the bottom smashed off it, but he'd picked it back up and downed it before a drop was spilled. Go figure.

Uncle Reg was so inebriated that night that he didn't even recognize my sister Tawny and kept eye-balling her and informing his wife that she (meaning Tawny) was from Ontario. I know at one point he acted out of order with Tawn, which is not like him at ALL, even when he is drunk. I do think that his behaviour was a result of the stress he has been under due to my aunt having breast cancer and his son undergoing major surgery. I know it shouldn't be an excuse but this is a man who is usually very sweet when sober and only very jolly when drunk.

My Uncle Jimmy: He had this total infatuation with Cat at one point thru the night. My Aunt Nita informed me that he'd said 'now that woman is my kind of woman' to which she replied 'what makes you think she'd even be interested in you Jimmy? She's way out of your league'. He just smiled and still insisted she was his kind of woman. At which point Aunt Nita stated that Cat was a lawyer. He still didn't stop talking about the lovely Cat. My aunt then pointed out Hunter and stated that he was a police detective. At which point he promptly clammed up and left the room. (Unbeknownst to us, he'd been getting high earlier in the evening).

My Aunt Bet: She spent most of the night completely out of it and out on the patio getting fresh air. My mother sat with her and figured she was pretty sick (she'd been really ill with flu the week prior). Turns out she'd tried my uncle's dope and it didn't sit well with her. Why on earth she made the decision to try drugs for the first time at the age of 52 and at our wedding is beyond me, but hey what can you do. I didn't know it was going on, until after the fact or else I don't think I would have found it as funny.

Glen and Darla: Let me say this - after driving the miles they drove to be at our wedding they deserved to get as well cut as they did. It was really funny to see Glen floating around the pool at 2 a.m. with his head nestled cozily between the two blow up boobs, with those big blue eyes staring out at us all...

and last but not least: Dawn

The day after our wedding I heard Tawny utter these words: 'I have NEVER seen Dawn that drunk in my whole life' (and they've known each other for over 20 years.) I guess Dawn only cuts lose when she's in the company of this McDonald sister - neither me nor my friends were surprised to see Dawn enjoying herself so thoroughly as it wasn't the first time, eh Dawn? It was a bit funny to tell Dawn about the silly things she'd done as she can't remember the night before, however I wouldn't play along with Andy in letting her think she'd gotten up to something really awful. I will say that Andy's brother-in-law Scott, my brother John and Glen won't ever forget her that night, - nor will those of us with her in the hot tub! And that's all I'm saying!

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