A Canadian gal living in Britain with 3 men and a dog. Wine helps.

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Friday, November 21, 2003

Life is just one damned thing after another --Elbert Hubbard

Song of the Day Heads Carolina - Tails California -- Jo Dee Mesina

So Many Mixed Emotions:
My visa isn't even in my hands yet and I'm already stressing about the upcoming holidays. I can't believe that I have to go through all of this decision making again especially so close to the looming holidays. Every person I tell about my visa is so excited for me, but I'm receiving two responses 1) How terrific! You will get to be with Andy over the Holidays! 2) Your leaving when??? Your going to leave your mom just before the holidays??? GAWD - like I'm not feeling enough agony over all of this already. I wish life were simple... but what am I supposed to do??? Wish away Andy's kids so that he could come here with ME??? Sorry, no can do. Wish that my two sisters were home so that my leaving wouldn't be so awful for everyone??? Sorry no can do - they have lives of their own. So... here I am again being pulled in different directions. My mother is still not saying much. She says 'you have to do what YOU want... you have a life.' However its not said with much zeal - you know what I mean??? I'm torn up here... in a big way. Part of me wants to say I'll stay until Boxing Day, but I know I will be sad without Andy. Either way it looks like I'm in for a pretty bittersweet Christmas. I just wish the whole Holiday could be erased - for this year anyway.

Happy Birthday Gavin!!!!
Well my little Godson turns seven today! He's growing so quickly - it only seems like yesterday his mom was telling me she was expecting him.... I remember the day she asked me to be his Godmother... I was floored. It really means the world to me, even if I have fallen away from the Catholic Church. I think to Roisin and Tim, its more than just being a Catholic anyway... its about being there for Gavin his whole life and even if I'm here or far away, they can certainly count on me. Today we are off to Studio Seven to watch Brother Bear.

Stacy's Crazy Cat
Daisy.... hhmmm what can I say??? Daisy is white and dainty, a sweet little cat really, when she's not being destructive. She absolutely adores Stacy and the feeling is mutual. Actually, even those who don't like cats can't really get away from the little minx's charms, just ask Andy, lol. BUT, however cute she is, she's still a bit nuts... like now, she is insisting on practically laying across the keyboard as I type. She barely ever comes around me these days, except for when I'm on the computer... then she feels as if she needs to be right in my face. What's up with that???

Goodbye Rupurt
Well Rupert took the boot in the ass last night on Survivor. I wasn't as surprised as he evidently was. However I do wish I could wipe the smug smile off that ass, John's face. Why do the ones you love to hate always make it so far??? I'm not gonna give up on the show like Dawn though. Rupert was a good guy, but he couldnt' hack losing. He was great so long as everything was going his way. His insecurities did not help, I know, but maybe he shouldn't have tried so hard. He said last night he felt as if he never fits in, no matter how hard he tries, however that wasn't the case. Rupert, they gave you the boot because you were too strong. End of story.

A Little Pick Me Up

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